July 31, 2008
Teenage Boy #1: Where the fuck are you going?
Teenage Boy #2: [mumble]
Teenage Boy #1 suddenly looks up and notices a man in a suit standing next to him at the street light.
TB #1: Hey, man. Do you know anyplace that is hiring?
Suited Man: Excuse me?
TB #1: Do you know anyplace that has jobs available?
Suited Man: Uh, no.
TB #1: Man...shit! (Jumps around and yells)
Me: [laughter]
What an excellent plan for getting a job. Wander around the city being obnoxious with your friend. Be obscene in front of someone you are going to ask about a job. Get visibly pissed off when that person tells you he can't help you.
You're half way there!
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February 24, 2008
I had never even concieved the thought of people purposefully pitting two stallions together to fight until one is injured so badly it may need to be slaughtered. Not to mention the rape and abuse the mare in season that is used to work the stallions into their crazed state is subject to. Gambling and crime syndicates keep the horse fights going.
Then again, why should I be surprised that people in third-world countries are treating animals barbarically when we here in the US aren't capable of treating our animals any better? When NFL quarterback Michael Vick is using "rape stands" to breed fighting dogs and killing them by the hundreds and Jaimie Foxx is saying that it's part of black culture so we should go easy on the guy?
The truth is it's part of gangster and drug dealing culture and an underclass that I hope to God is dying out. There are better things to do with your time and energy. One doesn't need to pit innocent animals against eachother, be they dogs, roosters, horses, or even camels.
There are a couple of things you can do to help the fighting horses of the Phillipines. You can stop travelling to these areas of the world that fight horses and let those officials know that they are losing your dollars. From the Network for Animals:
Horse Fighting, an illegal spectator blood sport where stallions are incited to fight one another, is widely practiced on the island of Mindanao in the southern Philippines. Fuelled by cash prizes for the owners of the winning horses and extensive gambling, horse fighting is a cruel spectacle that results in serious injuries and often death for the horses.
Please send a letter to the Mayor of Davao City, the largest city on the island of Mindanao and the economic hub of the area. Inform Mayor Duterte that as a compassionate traveler, you choose tourism destinations that are committed to treating animals humanely. Only when all horse fighting has been ended, will you consider traveling to Mindanao.
Rodrigo Duterte, Mayor
Davao City Investment Promotion Center
Door 10, Ramon Magsaysay Park Complex, R. Magsaysay Avenue
Davao City, Philippines
You can also contact the International Fund for Horses. Their Mission Statement:
The Mission of the Int'l Fund for Horses (IFH) is to promote and safeguard the health, safety and welfare of equines worldwide, domestic and in the wild.
IFH is dedicated to ensuring that humane standards are set and kept relating to the working and domestic lives of all equines from the beginning to the end of their lives. IFH is particularly committed to ending horse slaughter for human consumption wherever it exists.
Additionally, IFH is devoted to the preservation of wild horses, mules, donkeys, burros and zebras in their natural habitats.
Protecting Horses through Intervention, Education and Legislation
You can go to their Take Action page to sign up to help by writing a letter, sending a fax, or making a phone call. Nothing fancy, just a simple action that can help save a horse's life.
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!!!January 06, 2008
What an idiotic question!
And it's something that would never have ever been asked of a male candidate. It's hitting below the belt on a female candidate and it's absolutely ridiculous. It relates directly to the idea that men who show commanding traits are assertive and women who do so are bitches.
I believe Hillary Clinton's immediate inherent response was to look at Scott Spradling from WMUR like the idiot he is and say, "Likability? Did you ask Mr. Huckabee if he's concerned if he's more likable than Mr. McCain you asshat?" Instead, she was forced to choose from one of many more "acceptable" female responses:
Flirty - Giggle and tilt the head. Look down while smiling. Say, "Nuh uh!" (See: Any episode of Sex and the City when Carrie is asked on a date)
Playing Dumb - As lip begins to tremble allow the words, "What? He is?" to slip out before eyes well up in tears and collapsing onto the podium in tears.
Sexy - Bite finger, smolder eyes, ask huskily, "Are you sure about that?" while suddenly finding you must touch desk chair with every. part. of. body. Oooooh.
What Hillary chose in her two seconds she had to think was a coquettish, girlish response of, "Well, that hurts my feelings." I cringed for her in that moment. I think most powerful, strong women did the same Unfortunately, calling out Mr. Spradling would likely have ended her run at the Presidency.
Going forward, can we made sure that Hillary gets the same sort of questions that the boys get? I'm not even a Hillary supporter, but even asking the question was bad form.
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October 10, 2007
These are totally different points.
But the fact that President Bush is willing to deny that genocide occurred for political reasons makes me wonder how he sleeps at night.
Then again, I suppose must be pretty used to it at this point, having ignored it in Sudan for most of his presidency.
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October 07, 2007
Today I had to go to the Secondary Comic Book Store to look for the second volume of Empowered that was released this week. Unfortunately, like my First Choice Comic Book Store, they were out of it.
Frinklin and I were discussing the merits of various comics and laughing at the artwork on covers, as we usually do, enjoying our time inside the store. At First Chice CBS this will solicit commentary from Alex, the best clerk in the universe, which keeps us in the store for sometimes as long as an hour as we chat about the merits of various storylines, writers, art, artists, etc. In the Second Choice Store things went a little bit differently:
First, before we had even approached the counter, Lame Clerk decided to tell us, "Must have this week are Umbrella Academy, Unmen, and [something else I can't remember because it sucks]!" Um, no. A) Frinklin already has Umbrella Academy, B) I would never read Unmen and Frinklin hates it, and C) Why are you pointing your finger at me and telling me what I should buy before you even know what type of comics I'm interested in? If you wait until I'm up there and see what I'm buying and then make recommendations based on my purchase, that might make the slightest bit of sense.
Then there was this exchange:
Me: Dude, a Howard the Duck Zombie cover? Howard the Duck blows.
Clerk: Howard the Duck is silly!
Me: Howard the Duck is the lamest thing ever. The creator of Howard the Duck has disowned him. Howard is dead to his own creator.
Clerk: But he's funny!
Me: No. He's not. Howard the Duck is the essence of lame. Everyone knows that. It's the ultimate truth about Howard the Duck.
Clerk: He's funny.
Me: (internal: WRONG! WRONG! WRONG!)
Now, to you, this may seem like a simple exchange with a misguided clerk. But to me, this screams that the clerk is correcting me, a paying customer, as well as a simple truth of the universe over and over again like an idiot. And he would NOT let it go and allow me to be right. Because, obviously, I was right.
Witness another conversation:
Me: The Ms. Marvel zombie alternate cover isn't nearly as scary as the puppet-master cover. Puppets trump zombies for creepiness any day.
Clerk: But clowns are creepier than everything.
Me: ?!? (internal dialog: Shut up. Shut up. Shut up.)
I totally realize that I am overreacting in a major way to someone who was just trying to do his job. However, I have high customer service standards after working in customer service and retail for over 10 years. But there are simple rules for customer service, the first of which is DON'T BE FUCKING ANNOYING.
I like the owner of Secondary CBS, but I will never shop there when Annoying Clerk is handling the place again. He is dead to me.
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August 09, 2007
1993 – 1994 Tutor
· Assist middle school students with English assignments
1993 – 1996 Horse Clipper Extraordinaire
· Shave horses as needed in winter and late spring
· Sounds like a crazy job but I made $25/horse plus tips or $15 an hour and I was good at it
1994 – 1994 Stable Hand
· Feed and look after 20+ horses on small farm
· I shocked myself by asking for $17 dollars an hour when I was negotiating for the job, and getting it! I only worked a couple of hours a day.
1994 – 1997 Unit Counselor – Camp Winacka Girl Scout Camp
· Look after kids, lifeguard, crafts, riding instructor, hike, etc.
· Became a lesbian in spare time
· This job was pivotal in changing my thinking about everything in life. If there is one period in my life I could relive just to experience it, this is it.
· Unit Leader in 1997, left early due to mononucleosis
1995 – 1996 Super Pets (bought out by Pet Co shortly after I left) Sales Associate
· Care, feed, clean, sell, and train domestic and exotic birds (we even had toucans!) at large pet store
1997 – current Bob’s Hogs and Weiner Pigs
· Many different jobs including the one I do now
Anywhoo – throughout this time, I’ve either been my own boss, or I’ve had really great bosses. I could go on and on about Osa, the Camp Director at Winacka, who taught me so much by saying so little. I was at one of the most confusing times of my life (lesbian? good Christian girl?) and she dealt with it so well. She had to deal with half of the counselors pretty much having that issue. In retrospect, taking us all down to Tijuana and getting us drunk probably wasn’t the best way to deal with it, but it certainly allowed us to let our true feelings show.
Or Ginny, my manager at one BobÂ’s Hogs location who helped woo me to another location with her and then when I left again for other reasons was smart enough to see that I wasnÂ’t happy and made me an offer I couldnÂ’t refuse (not that way you dirty birds). She pushed me gently in the direction I needed to go to move forward on my career path, forcing me to advance without my even knowing it. Growing my skills and abilities and allowing me to challenge myself when I became bored with what I was doing. And I loved her kindness and friendliness and the fact that she let me do my own job while she did hers.
And then for a time I was terrified when I was offered a new position with all new territory and answered to the High Powered Boss of All Things I Do and I fell apart a bit. One has an outline of a position and a goal, and itÂ’s my place to make up the points in between. Once I nailed that part down, the High Powered Boss of All Things I Do became more of a partner and I really got to like her.
And now there is Beet. To the best of my reckoning, all Beet does is sit around all day sending out crappy memos every so often telling us what great ideas other people are having. Sometimes he’ll ride a plane somewhere and then send us emails from that location. He’ll even title the e-mails “Thoughts from Phoenix” or some other such crap. You can see why the bullshit detecting antennae are immediately waving about.
Every Monday there is a conference call with Beet where we must start by unveiling some layer of ourselves that is personal and painful, such as what our childhood nickname was. IÂ’ll be damned if IÂ’m going to tell my work colleagues my true childhood nickname. Junior high school was a traumatic time for the best of us and I will not be known as space cow (internets, I am trusting you!) for the rest of my working life. So I throw out the name a roommate used for me in my early twenties, but I can feel the old nickname there, heavy on me for the rest of the call. When I met with another rep at work that had been on the call he confided that he had a terrible childhood and does not want to discuss that time at all, ever again. I can see tears in his eyes. This is bad, I think. Bad.
Next Monday I am asked to share what celebrity I most resemble. I panic. There is no celebrity that I most resemble. I am round. I am not angular and hollow like those women. No one has ever said to me that I look like a thin, starving woman that appears on stage, screen, and in tabloids. What do I say? I am quiet as others answer reluctantly or eagerly. I nod silently as the people I have met give their answers. One says, “The creature from the black lagoon” and everyone laughs. Beet says my name.
“No one.” I say. “I don’t look like anyone famous. I look like me.”
“Oh, you don’t want to play along that’s fine! That’s fine, Ensie!” yells Beet into the phone in front of 12 other people. “You’re just spoiling the game! It’s just an icebreaker!”
I’ve always had a hard time letting things go, especially criticism. I am unusually silent on this conference call and Beet calls me on it, stating that there are points given for participation, and inflecting a smarmy voice, “points taken for being silent!” The stew inside continues to boil and I say nothing except to argue with him occasionally.
I have tried and tried to find the good points of this man’s personality, but am having a difficult time. I thought maybe I was just jealous, he having gotten the job that might have been mine, had I a little more confidence or experience in management. But every day that he send another idiotic e-mail, or calls to ask for yet another update on a big sale that is confirmed but will not happen until late next month (“Still confirmed, still not happening until late next month, Beet.”), I wonder what this man is doing within the outline of his job description to make his goal.
And the haranguing just continues, “Justify your expenses!” Beet shrieks, “What is this $12.99 charge at Red Robin? Weren’t you in your OWN territory? Were you entertaining a client?” I explain that I was in a series of meeting hours from home and that I had taken a break for lunch, something I do once or twice month, something his boss had no problem with when she was my boss for several years. Beet pauses for a nanosecond, “Well, I spoke with the DIRECTOR and he specifically stated that you can no longer lunch ALONE on the company’s dime. Also, please look into you postage expenses and make sure that you are using your funds most EFFECTIVELY.”
The man speaks in capital letters.
I’ve spent hours on the phone with my Dad detailing the daily idiocy of Beet and how to deal with it. My Dad’s guidance has been great, except that he seems a little too anxious to guide me to quit my job (Well, if you don’t like it, you can always leave), which I know is always an option, but it’s not an option, if you know what I mean. He told me today that I could just start sending Beet a daily e-mail correcting his screw-ups. Because a) Beet requires a daily e-mail to correct his fuck ups (like “Hey Beet, today you stated that the book Loving Frank is an exclusive to Bob’s Hogs, but it’s so totally not, also, it is not an architecture book, it’s a novel”) and b) Beet would totally love it if I started correcting all his errors. Bosses love that kind of shit.
The problem really is, I love my job and I hate my boss.
I keep hoping that Beet secretly hates his job and all of us who work for him too. He certainly acts like it. Maybe heÂ’s looking for another job. I hope so.
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July 29, 2007
My mom actually fluctuates between being a size 6 and a size 10 (please don't hate me for talking about this Mom). She's petite, and gaining or losing a few pounds makes a huge difference in her size, which sucks for her because it creates a major swing in her wardrobe. MOM - TOTALLY NORMAL. She's struggled with her weight her entire life, but is now a Weight Watchers lifetime member and I'm so proud of her. She works so hard at it and I love her so much for what she's accomplished because it makes her happy. But I love her no matter what she weighs or what she looks like.
My sister Katie has a hard time keeping weight on. Yes, you heard that right. Keeping weight ON. She works outdoors as a therapeutic horseback riding instructor for disabled kids and can walk up to fifteen miles a day in the So. Cal sun, so she's constantly working out, all day long. She tends to be a size 4 or 6, and was cautioned against losing weight before the wedding for fear her gorgeous dress would not fit. If I haven't mentioned it before, she also has almost nonexistent leg hair, is perpetually tan, small pores, and her hair is perfectly, naturally highlighted by the sun. She wears almost no makeup and looks great. I swear to God I'm not just saying this because I'm her sister. If she didn't want to remain anonymous I would post her picture and you would see it's true.
Sister Nikki is 15 years old and is a perfect six. She's freckled and naturally cute.
Then there's me. I'm into the double digits of clothing sizes, well into the upper teens to be honest. I've gained weight since moving to Washington and I haven't been as active as I once was, even though this place seems to spawn hikers and campers by the carload. I have a hard time doing anything in the rain and my job has changed from moving heavy boxes for at least an hour a day to being almost completely desk bound. I know I need to get active but starting is the hardest part.
Anyway - enough intro, lets get to the main event!
I made several trips down to San Diego, only to drive North again to Costa Mesa to a well known bridal shop. These were fun trips with all of us sharing a fitting room, watching my sister try on various wedding gowns until she found the perfect one, seeing my Mom find the perfect mother-of-the-bride-dress, and so on.
Predictably, the sample dresses were not available in sizes over 12, so I had to make due with slinging the hangers over my head and holding them against my body to see if I thought they would look good. Fortunately, I have a good sense of what does look good one my body, so I picked out a dress with a V-neck, empire waisted, floor length, with wide shoulder straps, and a relatively high back. My Mom and sisters picked out a few other dresses for me to try, but in the end the dress I knew would work was the one that was chosen.
Nikki, Mom, and I all needed out measurements taken to get our dresses ordered that day, and a sales assistant was called to help. She took Nikki's measurements, then carefully measured my Mom, then turned to me and asked, "Would you like everyone to step out of the room while I take yours?"
"What?" I asked, incredulously,"They're my family. I'm pretty sure they know I'm fat. Hey guys," I said, turning around, "You do know I'm fat, right?"
Katie laughed, Nikki blushed, and my Mom looked me disapprovingly (not because I'm fat, but because I was making fun of the sales assistant). The sales assistant had the decency to look chagrined. She took my measurements and shut the hell up.
I wish that I had taken it further - that I had asked her why she had offered to have everyone leave when I had to strip down to my underthings but not when they did. Or if she did that for everyone who is overweight. Or if she singles out all overweight people and treats them differently.
Getting that dress was so unbelievable stressful. If it had been up to me, I would have worn pants to the wedding. I had never owned a formal dress until until Katie's wedding. I did not attend a single formal dance in high school (I was too busy with horse shows), and wore jeans to my own elopement and backyard reception. I still haven't seen the official wedding photos, so I really have no idea what I really looked like at the event. But it still makes my eyes sting to remember how painful the process of buying the dress was.
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April 26, 2007
GIG HARBOR, Wash. -- Restrictions on the use of school security videotape have been tightened after images of two high school students kissing were shown to the parents of one of the girls, officials say.--Kiro TV (Associated Press)Keith Nelson, dean of students at Gig Harbor High School, said he saw the students kissing and holding hands in the school's busy commons, checked a surveillance camera and showed the parents the tape because they had asked him a few weeks earlier to alert them to any conduct by their daughter that was out of the ordinary.
They then transferred their daughter to a school outside the Peninsula School District, which lies northwest of Tacoma.
Both girls said their privacy was invaded and denied doing anything wrong. Neither was identified by name in an article published Thursday by The News Tribune of Tacoma.
The kiss amounted to a quick "peck," said the girl who remains at the school, a 17-year-old senior described as the daughter of a News Tribune employee.
"We weren't doing anything inappropriate, nothing anyone else wouldn't do," she said.
Nelson said students could not have any expectation of privacy in a crowded place and maintained that he would have taken the same action had the students kissing been a boy and a girl.
An internal investigation into a complaint from a student -- it was unclear whether the complaint came from one of the girls -- established that Nelson had not violated district policy, Assistant School Superintendent Shannon Wiggs said.
Even so, Principal Greg Schellenberg said, school surveillance videotape may now be used only for security monitoring and discipline for actions such as trespassing, vandalism and fighting.
Kissing and other public displays of affection were at the time and remain violations of school rules, but violators will first be given warnings and will be disciplined only for a second offense, Schellenberg said. In addition, school employees are barred from sharing surveillance video in response to an open-ended parental request.
"It's not our normal practice," Schellenberg said. "It's not going to happen again."
In the case of the kiss, he added, "the same information could have been portrayed to the family without the video."
Nelson said he respected the change in policy but added that he believes his first obligation is to parents.
"They're paying good money for us to make their kids good citizens," he said. "Whatever that means to the parents, I'll do it."
The father of the transferred student spoke on local radio earlier today, stating that they had found, "evidence of homosexual activity, which we believe to be an abomination." He went on to say that his daughter had been "transferred to a school that deals with this sort of thing."
I am totally disgusted with the Dean, the school, and the father of this girl, video or no video. Is it their policy to report heterosexual hand-holding and kissing to parents? I highly doubt it.
And way to go dad - I've been the "abomination" route and it sucks. Parental disappointment can be an incredible burden, and trying to find yourself while someone condemns you to hell for falling for the "wrong" sex doesn't help.
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April 24, 2007
Two teens, 14- and 16-year-old Kyle Adams and Ryan Adams, went to the Bentonville PL, AR, in February so the younger brother could look up material on military academies. However, they wound up looking at The Whole Lesbian Sex Book (registration required to view), by Felice Newman, a book their father said left his sons "greatly disturbedÂ… and this matter has caused many sleepless nights in our house." Earl Adams, according to The Morning News, has asked the city to pay $10,000 in damages per child, which is the maximum under the state obscenity law. While the library director, Cindy Suter, first moved the book to a less accessible location, the library advisory board subsequently agreed the book should be taken from circulation, saying they sought to find a more suitable book. "A more sensitive, more clinical approach to same material might be more appropriate for the library," one member said.--Library Journal
Somehow I doubt that the book traumatized the boys in any way. And since they were supposed to be looking at military academies...
I would be interested to know if The Whole Lesbian Sex Book was moved to an alternate area of the library while leaving books on heterosexual sex readily accessible. This title has been reviewed and recommended by the Library Journal for all public library collections. The father has stated that any attempts to return the book to the library will "be met with legal action and protests from the Christian community."
This story prompted a quick email between my boss and I:
Ensie: "Greatly disturbed"? This is my favorite story ever from the library journal.
Boss Lady: I knew you were going to come back with a comment. "Sleepless nights"? Yeah, I'll bet.
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June 22, 2006
Was it really necessary to egg my brand new car last night to celebrate your graduation or some other anticlimactic event? I haven't even made a payment on it yet. I've never owned a brand new car before. Finding several eggs glued to the side this morning...lets just say you're lucky I don't know who you are. Even better, I had two appointments that kept me from getting the nasty mess removed until this afternoon. As the weather is warming up, the eggs had solidified and bonded to the paint by the time I got to the carwash.
Ah, the carwash. I don't know where there is a hand wash in Tacoma, so I had to take it the Pink Elephant. My brand new car got to travel through the car washing tunnel. If you've ever had a new car, which I doubt, you'll know that the car wash tunnel scratches the hell out of the clear coat finish on a new car. In addition to the big scratches where the eggs met car, the finish is now marred. You may not be able to see it, but I can. Oh--and the guy who dried off the car? He used a RAZOR to pick the stuck-on eggshells off, resulting in some great gouges in the paint. So, again, thanks for that!
You are a total asshole and I hope that bad car karma follows you the rest of your days. May everything you own be a lemon and should you ever have a brand new car, I hope some dickwad eggs the hell out of it.
Fuck you,
Ensie
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April 27, 2006
CC: The Universe
From: Ensie
Date: 04/27/06
Re: Dead to Me
____________________________
Please cease the use of these "words" (I use the term loosely) effective immediately.
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September 07, 2005
Why is there scented toilet paper? My husband accidentally picked it up and purchased it as he was afflicted with a cold that prevented his being able to smell the hideousness that is your scented toilet paper.
It's disgusting. And it's permeated my entire house. First it was just the bathroom, but now it's the kitchen and the bedroom. Not only is scented toilet paper wrong in theory, but in practicality it's also a bad idea.
It seems obvious to me that a man came up with this idea, just as a man likely came up with the scented tampon idea, and the scented pad. No woman is going to voluntarily put something down there that smells that bad. It's a sensitive area, and does not enjoy being coated in stinky chemicals.
Sincerely,
ensie
PS--I feel bad throwing away 8 rolls of toilet paper, even ones that are coated in what may be the worst imitation of a floral scent ever. Maybe I'll shop them around my neighborhood...
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September 01, 2005
The "customer service" representative (seriously, they should just be honest and title them "Fuckwads") sighed when I explained my sistuation. I was extremely patient, considering that I waited on hold for over ten minutes. I told her that my understanding was that the payment was due today, and did my paperwork/coupon/statement possibly get lost in the mail? I'm trying not to piss these people off--they own my house.
"No. It was sent on the 26th of August."
I asked if that was normal and would my statements always arrive after the due date?
"So my payment won't be considered late if it is received late due to your late billing?"
"
"You're sure?"
I said thanks and politely hung up the phone. When I arrived home today the statements were waiting for me and I have since written the check to go out tomorrow. Is it too much to ask that the bank sets up some sort of communication with their customers to explain their idiotic system? I'm new at this. Help me out a little.
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April 22, 2005
First off--"...at this time your request was processed." makes no sense.
But my real complaint is this--how can the number I provided not exist when this letter shows up the SAME DAY as the actual BILL from the company that holds the account? Shouldn't these two letters have caused some sort of time/space continuum error by sharing space in the same mailbox together? At the very least I think I shouldn't have to pay my bill since the number doesn't exist.
Elizabeth, the T-Mobile rep who helped me on the phone confirmed that I do, indeed, have an account with T-Mobile and I should contact Young America immediately so they can confirm it with T-Mobile via phone. However, Young America has annoyed me further by closing before my mail is even delivered. Now, after waiting 8 weeks for a rebate (and checking on it two weeks ago and being assurred that "It is in process") I must wait through the weekend to vent my righteous anger upon discuss this issue further with a Young America customer service representative.
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August 30, 2004
Scented menstrual pads (apparently, you can't link directly to this product, so once you get there, you need to click on "Pantiliners," then "Incredibly Thin Everyday Liners" to get there).
And not just any scents. Kotex bring us protection in three completely odd flavors; Aloe, Lavender, and Chamomile. Am I the only one who thinks this is totally disgusting?
Did I not make myself clear with an earlier letter to Tampax about this sort of thing?
Seriously, people. What is wrong with you? I think they need to fire the "new products" departments at these companies. Really, is there that much new technology to be had in the period-protection department? Women have been doing it for years without any sort of assistance so far. I think we can continue on without our girlie parts smelling like a strong cup of tea.
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June 29, 2004
A few examples that are currently irking me:
· The most recent Midol commercial is really getting to me. Picture girls on the beach, in bathing suits. Girl A is wearing a bikini and Girl B, looking shocked, asks, “You’re wearing a bikini during your period?!?” Girl A mentions that she is, and that she took Midol to get rid of bloating, cramps, and TIREDNESS (“irritability” also may be mentioned, usually I’m too busy yelling to Frinklin about the commercial to really pay attention at this point). Now, I’ve only ever taken Midol once, and it didn’t do shit for my nausea-inducing cramps. And it really didn’t have any effect on my energy level. Most pain killers don’t. Whatever—my point is, tiredness is not generally a factor when considering swimsuit styles. If it was, thousands of spring breakers would be covered in burkas each year.
· Why does the word “girthy” need to be used to describe hot dogs? And does this word need constantly repeated by a man eating a hot dog? Let’s be honest—he’s giving head to the hot dog, and I don’t want to see it. Or hear it. Or even hear the word “girthy” again. Ever. And I’m not the only one who sees this as a problem
· KFC needs to stop advertising completely. Right now. Do they really think we’re stupid enough to believe that KFC really stands for “Kitchen Fresh Chicken?” We all know it’s FRIED. We all know it’s bad for you. If you really want to get into what “KFC” stands for, why not this ? And if that weren’t bad enough…now they’re offering the NASCAR Dale Earnhardt Jr. Collectible Chicken Bucket! Ew. Then again, it’s easier to focus my hate when NASCAR and KFC are blended together into one awful focal point.
There are soooo many others. These are just the ones that come to mind immediately.
Posted by: Ensie at
07:28 PM
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June 28, 2004
I'm not even talking about babies at the movie theater...that's a whole other post. I'm talking about parents with no judgment skills, and no consideration.
I don’t think I’m that much of a prude. I mean, I watched Sex and the City and wasn’t offended. Hey—I watch Real Sex and spend most of my time laughing uncontrollably (did the you SEE the creepy RealDoll? But I cringe at parents that don’t seem to be able to judge appropriate material for the 5-year-old mind. Especially at the movies.
For those parents who can’t seem to leave their kids at home or realize they need to wait for the DVD—I have no qualms about shushing you. Nor do I feel bad about talking shit with my husband/sister/friend LOUDLY as you choose your seat near me. I am fully capable of controlling myself should I be at a kid’s movie (Shrek 2, Harry Potter, etc.). I recognize that I’m on their turf at that time and I need to be tolerant.
However, if I have to sit through one more clearly rated R film, seated in front of, next to, or behind any small child constantly asking, “Why he doing that Mommy?” REALLY loudly…I cannot be responsible for my actions.
Posted by: Ensie at
07:22 PM
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