Lactose Incompetent is thanking Rush Limbaugh. I will have to second him in that, although it pains me to do so.

At the same time, I'd like to give a big "F-You!" to Sean Hannity's show for starting the idiotic conspiracy theory that caused all sorts of hysteria over bookstores supposedly refusing to carry Unfit for Command.

Posted by: Ensie at 09:06 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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Found at Drudge Report (God help me):

Alan Keyes, the Republican candidate for a vacant U.S. Senate seat in Illinois, said Tuesday that Vice President Dick Cheney's daughter Mary is a "selfish hedonist" because she is a lesbian.

His comments came during an interview with SIRIUS satellite radio.

Keyes said: "The essence of ... family life remains procreation. If we embrace homosexuality as a proper basis for marriage, we are saying that it's possible to have a marriage state that in principal excludes procreation and is based simply on the premise of selfish hedonism."

Asked whether that meant Mary Cheney "is a selfish hedonist," Keyes said: "That goes by definition. Of course she is."

Aside from the totally unnecessary low blow at Mary Cheney; does Mr. Keyes mean to imply that infertile people shouldn't be allowed to get married either, as they are not able to procreate?

Damn you! You selfish hedonistic infertiles!

(Frinklin pointed out that people beyond child-bearing age would also be exempt from marriage--selfish hedonistic old people!)

Posted by: Ensie at 08:33 PM | Comments (6) | Add Comment
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Morpheus


?? Which Of The Greek Gods Are You ??
brought to you by Quizilla

Posted by: Ensie at 07:01 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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Samir


What Office Space character are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Posted by: Ensie at 09:33 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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Went out searchin' to link it up this evening and came across the following:

ManhattanDan - " The Economist ran a fun historical article about just how republican New York has been through the ages. They agree with me, so they must be geniuses."

Are You Like Me? - " Yes, I do suffer from drug induced dreams, yet I don't do drugs."

Enjoy!

Posted by: Ensie at 09:30 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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I know I have a weird obsession with hygeine products. I don't deny it. I've posted about both deoderant and tampons. But now, I bring before you a new level of weirdness:

Scented menstrual pads (apparently, you can't link directly to this product, so once you get there, you need to click on "Pantiliners," then "Incredibly Thin Everyday Liners" to get there).

And not just any scents. Kotex bring us protection in three completely odd flavors; Aloe, Lavender, and Chamomile. Am I the only one who thinks this is totally disgusting?

Did I not make myself clear with an earlier letter to Tampax about this sort of thing?

Seriously, people. What is wrong with you? I think they need to fire the "new products" departments at these companies. Really, is there that much new technology to be had in the period-protection department? Women have been doing it for years without any sort of assistance so far. I think we can continue on without our girlie parts smelling like a strong cup of tea.

Posted by: Ensie at 08:23 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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Today is my six month blogoversary. I've survived the infant stages and am moving rapidly toward toddler-hood.

Posted by: Ensie at 07:44 PM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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Watch this, then listen to the sobbing of Def Leppard fans everywhere. I urge you to sit through the whole thing, if possible.

Posted by: Ensie at 10:06 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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L. informed me yesterday that she was finally able to get a copy of the Garden State soundtrack from the distributor. Finally! I should have it in just a few days.

Posted by: Ensie at 09:58 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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Further proof that people are dumb.

Found via Desert Raspberry.

Posted by: Ensie at 09:05 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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I realize that dividing your time between Rush Limbaugh and Bill OÂ’Reilly doesnÂ’t leave you much time to focus on facts, but as a bookstore employee, please allow me to enlighten you. Currently, there are plenty of rumors that bookstores around the nation are conspiring to keep Unfit for Command off shelves and out of customersÂ’ hands. This is truly one of the stupidest things I have ever heard.

Bookstores are first and foremost businesses, especially the big-box bookstores. Your average bookstore employee may not agree with your particular political views, but the company views making money as the top priority. Unfit for Command is the number one bestseller in the country, and every bookstore wishes they could keep enough stock on hand to sell to everyone who wanted one.

The publisher has recently stated that they are the reason that the book is not on bookstore shelves:

Regnery spokeswoman Kelley Keeler said Tuesday that the company, a longtime publisher of conservative authors such as William F. Buckley Jr. and Pat Buchanan, can't keep up with the "huge" demand, in part because the book's September publication date was moved up as interest in the book grew.

"We're trying to get more copies out as fast as we can," spokeswoman Keeler said.

Next time you all get together to come up with a book, please MAKE THE PRINT RUN LARGER. Print ten million. Please. Let people see what a bunch of story changing, Republican connected folks you are. I encourage you.

My real hope is that this will keep asshats* like yourselves from yelling at myself or my fellow booksellers every time we have to explain that we have sold out of the book. You don't want to hear that we will gladly order the book for you when available again or reserve you a copy when we get more in stock. As soon as, “No, we can…” is out of my mouth I’m being screamed and stomped at with shouts of “Liberal bias!” and “I’ll never shop here again!”

IÂ’m tired of hearing from you. Please go away. ItÂ’s not a conspiracy. Just chill the fuck out. I really want the Garden State soundtrack but they didnÂ’t print enough of that either. So IÂ’m waiting, too.

Thanks,

Ensie

*Thanks to Your Moosey Fate for reminding what a fun word "asshat" is. Asshat! Hahahaha.

Posted by: Ensie at 07:38 PM | Comments (5) | Add Comment
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A little over a week ago, Richard at Pearly Gates decided to make fun of my sport of choice, Dressage. To the untrained eye, I suppose it can look like competative horse walking. However, it is actually closer to ballet on horseback.

Seriously.

The horse and rider move in together in perfect balance, performing varying levels of specified maneuvers within a rectangular ring. My Dad compares watching Dressage to watching grass grow. "It takes a sophisticated eye!" I've been known to reply. Dressage is performed as part of Three Day Eventing and Dressage-only Olympic competition.

Well, now the laugh is on him. His favorite Anaheim Angel, Troy Glaus, is married to a woman named Ann, who I grew up riding with; riding dressage with, to be exact. Until recently, she still taught my sister on the weekends.

Posted by: Ensie at 06:45 PM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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Inspired by Random Pensees' post of an amusing T-shirt he saw recently, I present the following:

On a T-shirt of a co-worker:
-Can't sleep, clowns will eat me...

On bumperstickers:
-I thought I wanted a career, but it turns out I really just wanted paychecks.
-Help wanted: telepath. You know where to apply.
-I pretend to work. They pretend to pay me.
-I'm just working here till a good fast-food job opens up
-Suburbia: Where they cut down the trees and name the streets after them
-There are two kinds of pedestrians...the quick and the dead.

Posted by: Ensie at 07:59 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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Take the What High School
Stereotype Are You? quiz.

Thanks Frinklin.

Posted by: Ensie at 10:31 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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I've been feeling rather famous lately. In the span of just a few days, I ended up with several new links to Both Hands from Mediocre Fred (who will be moving to Munuvania soon, I believe), All Things Jen(nifer), and Serial Blogonomy. I don't say this because I'm bragging (Ok, a little) but more because I'm insecure and every new link is someone saying, "I like you. Lets be blog friends!"

Maybe they're not saying anything remotely that goofy, but in my head, that's what it sounds like. I don't want to a link whore, but (and other bloggers will support me on this, I'm sure) you really do feel good when someone likes you enough to link to you. Plus, I remember the lean times when Frinklin was the only person who linked to me.

Starting a blog is easy. Staying with a blog for any length of time is difficult. You have to convince yourself that what you have to say is interesting enought that people will seek it out to read it. Sometimes by accident, but hopefully, eventually, someone will look for your site on purpose and possibly (if you're really lucky) on a consistent basis. Thinking about the number of websites and blogs on the internet makes my brain hurt, like thinking about infinity.

So, I've decided to link it up every so often to mostly newer (or just new to me) blogs. You can call it a "new blog showcase" if you like. I prefer to think of it as visiting new neighbors with a pie. Not that I would ever actually do that in my neighborhood.

I searched and searched the Infinite Microbe Universe at Truth Laid Bear's Ecosystem and came up with the following:

The Utility Muffin Research Kitchen--"Shitting Hell! I MUST KNIT CAKES AND BISCUITS! It is surely what I was BORN to do!"

Debbie Does Drivel--"Check your e-mail, then one second later, check it again, because the e-mail could have come in that space between one second before and one second later?"

The Armchair Critic--"I don't know anyone who sincerely enjoys the act of sweating profusely through a t-shirt for an hour and then smelling like dead grass to boot. "

Posted by: Ensie at 11:55 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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Thanks Fred! Glad to see someone has some taste buds around here that aren't corrupted by the Olive Garden.

Posted by: Ensie at 10:25 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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A full price movie review! That's how good this movie is. How good is it?

So good I cried. Twice. Since I cry at pretty much everything, this isn't a big surprise to those who know me.

So good I laughed many times. And not at stupid things, but at smart dialog and good writing.

So good I immediately drove to Best Buy and attempted to purchase the soundtrack. They were out. I then proceeded to drive my husband crazy by asking him to visit every store he passed on his way home that sold any type of music. He went to 5 stores and came home empty handed. I called three more stores and also struck out. I finally downloaded the iTunes iMix (The "i" ibefore ieverything istops ibeing icute iand igets ireally iold iafter iabout ithree iminutes ion iTunes) of the Garden State Soundtrack, as the real soundtrack wasn't available. A couple of the artists aren't even available on iTunes, so I'm still gonna need to order it somewhere. Dammit. I guess I should be pleased that so many others are also loving the soundtrack, but it makes life more difficult for me.

So good I called Frinklin upon leaving the theater and informed him that I would be leaving him for Zach Braff. I feel a little guilty about this, as Frinklin was the one who originally got me to start watching Scrubs. It's always worse when the husband introduces his wife to the other man.

I'll be going back to visit my boyfriend on the big screen this weekend. And Natalie Portman, who I also love.

Confidential to Zach Braff (who I'm SO sure will be reading this)--Thank you for giving Natalie Portman's character epilepsy. My sister has epilepsy, and for whatever reason, it makes me happy to see others with epilepsy portrayed as normal human beings without seizures, as they are most of the time.

PS--Zach Braff's Garden State Blog will be taking up permanent residence in my blogroll, too. Because I love him.

Posted by: Ensie at 07:18 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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I'm not one of those people who eats at a lot of fancy-schmancy, high-falouten (just how does one spell "falouten"?) restaurants. I'm a poor person. I can't afford to blow several day's worth of income on one meal (however, I do accept gifts and charity for such restaurants). We at the Frinklin-Ensie household are chain restaurant eaters, and proud of it.

I enjoy a good Denny's breakfast, although Cocos is better. I'm a fan of Pat and Oscars (thank you God, for sending your breadsticks down from Heaven). I love a good Big Mac, Whopper, or Chipotle taco. Long live the chain restaurant.

However, I HATE the Olive Garden. Hate. And I love you Dawn, but you are SO wrong on the Olive Garden thing. Their food is just plain bad. Why would you EVER need to eat at the Olive Garden when there is the garden of eden that is Romanos Macaroni Grill? I literally walked through a snowstorm for 1/2 mile (and back!) to get to the Macaroni Grill that was several icy blocks from my Ann Arbor, Michigan hotel room this past March. And I'm from San Diego. I don't do snow. Ever.

Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe the Olive Gardens are better back East, but I doubt it.

Oh--and Applebee's? You can suck it. I hate you too.

Posted by: Ensie at 07:32 PM | Comments (5) | Add Comment
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Apparently, believing in Hell makes us better people, and better off. So says as a study from the Federal Reserve Bank of St. Louis.

This really does make sense. Although it doesn't make a great case for the inherent nature of mankind, what with the apprent threat of eternal damnation hanging over us to keep us on the straight and narrow.

In sort-of related news; Romanian police are sending criminals to church instead of prison, and they say it works. I realize such a thing would never fly in the US (that pesky freedom of religion thing might get in the way), but it's interesting to see in a country that is very religious.

Posted by: Ensie at 07:00 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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Tyler Hamilton won the gold medal in the Olympic time trial in cycling. It was great to see him win, especially after all the health problems he's had.

But the best part? After the race, a reporter asked Hamilton about his performance. He stated that the race was dedicated to his dog, Tugoboat, who had died while Hamilton raced in the Tour de France earlier this year. He held up a small metal object--Tugboat's dog tag--which he carried with him while he raced. Sniff.

To read Hamilton's own words on his dog click here.

Posted by: Ensie at 10:13 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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